Losing Track of Time

This is all very weird and scary, and it is definitely messing with my head. I spent the whole week thinking it was Thursday, right up until Friday when I thought that it was already Saturday. I’m focusing on the garden a lot as the weather in Seattle finally warms up. Making some food and adding extra color to the world seems like a very good thing right now.

Please be safe and, wherever possible, take care of the people, animals, and plants around you.

Pineberry blossoms. They’re a white strawberry that tastes slightly of pineapple.
Morning glory seedlings and baby strawberries, because there will be flowers and eventually fresh fruits. Spring is here.
Cherry blossoms from our ornamental cherry tree. It doesn’t make much in the way of cherries, but it does look beautiful.
More cherry blossoms
Some new narcissus flowers that we added to the garden a week or two back. They’re almost in full bloom now.

Keeping the Balance

The schedule I’ve been using for a few months is still working well for me, overall. It’s gone through some adjustments, and I’ve had some pretty rough days where things just fell apart, but it’s good to be in a place where those unproductive days don’t snowball into whole weeks of frustration and self-recrimination.

The dogs and the bunny have even gotten on board. They each get a quick training session every morning before I sit down to work. Their increased biddability does not hurt my focus, even though it probably is just an act they’re keeping up while they plot my doom. I’ve also been managing to regularly fit in yard work like raking, weeding, and planting beautiful flower bulbs for the squirrels to dig up and throw around like tiny beach balls. I’ve read/listened my way through more than a few books already this year, and I’ve even been doing a little bit of freelance writing.

There’s still always that impulse to think everything is going well, so I might as well add, like, ten or fifteen new things to my list this week. I remind myself that I can only manage a little bit more at a time, but then it all seems equally important, so I tell myself that a lot more will just have to be fine. (Spoiler: it wasn’t. It never is.) 

I’ve never managed to run at my full capacity without immediately going over the red line and into rapid burnout levels of stress. Part of the problem is that it’s genuinely challenging for me to tell the difference between the two sides of that line, having had so little experience with balancing near it for any length of time. Consistent effort of any kind is tiring in a different way from a sprint or a last minute scramble before a looming deadline, and gauging its effects probably takes practice.

So, I’m practicing.

A yellow flower drooping out over a mossy curb

Winter Blooms

This winter in Seattle can’t seem to make up its mind. No snow quite yet, but plenty of drizzle. They’ve been predicting it for a few days, though, so maybe we’ll have gotten some noticeable flakes by the time this posts. That’d be fun.

With the colder weather rolling in, I’m super happy to have the third season of Anne with an E to watch, because it definitely picked up in the second season. Not that I didn’t like the first season, but I really love the diversity of characters they introduced as they went along. It feels like they’ve very much kept the spirit of the books and just broadened the scope of it.

And, in keeping with that spirit, here are some very romantical winter flowers that I discovered in the arboretum. Turns out they have a whole garden devoted to things that bloom in the colder months, and it is gorgeous. It smells amazing, too.

Daphne flowers. I thought they were a type of jasmine at first, because the scent was so sweet and strong, but they’re a whole different plant that I now really want for my own garden.

Daphne flowers

Hellebore

Pink camellias, I’m pretty sure

More pink camellias

Yellow witch hazel flowers. They smelled divine.

Yellow witch hazel with lots of frilly lichen

More yellow witch hazel and a path through the bushes

Orange witch hazel flowers

Some sort of interesting bulbous flower bud on bare branches. Possibly an edgeworthia, but I’m not sure.

A still pond full of algae and floating plants

A pair of mallard ducks in a different pond

Some new buds forming on a mossy branch in front of ferns

Not Feeling the Winter Dormancy

I know it’s a trick, but this week of almost spring-like weather in Seattle is making me want to go out and dig stuff up, and plant other stuff, and just be outside. It’s been cold, but not too rainy. I hear we’re in for a proper cold snap, though, so I guess I’d better prepare to hunker down with various hot liquids and cuddly dogs and/or partners for a while. I did go out and check on the garden today, and found that most of my herbs and berries have survived the winter so far. Hopefully they can hang on a little longer.

My pet snakes are busy brumating, which is like hibernation but without the intense commitment. They’re awake, but they don’t eat, or really move around all that much. They mostly just hiss irritably at me every time I check on them. My little lizard has gone into her version of brumation, too, and she actually does sleep the whole time. I can wake her up to check on her, but she goes right back to her snoozin’ corner after I’m done handling her. She won’t eat anything for another month, probably. Possibly longer. (The frog doesn’t mess around with that winter fasting shit, though. He’ll try to eat my fingers if I take too long with his bugs any time of the year.)

Even all my indoor plants are growing extra slowly, despite all the lights I use to turn my office into an artificial sunroom. It’s funny, because I think part of the reason I’m so ready for any signs of spring being on the horizon is just because I’m not feeling especially dormant myself, even though I usually hate the cold and dark to the point of wanting to copy my reptiles and just sleep through it entirely.

The new year feels pretty promising to me so far, especially with the changes I’ve made over the last few months. Having medication that helps me stay alert and focused during the day, and actually doing most of my sleeping at night instead of during those precious few daylight hours changes my experience of winter dramatically. That isn’t exactly a shock, it’s just a new experience. Previously, this basic stability and control that a lot of people probably take for granted was mostly beyond my grasp.

Even though my garden and half my pets are down for the rest of the season, I feel like I’m just waking up.

You can’t see it, but these strawberry seedlings are shivering. Image: a bunch of young strawberry plants in a terracotta pot.

IMG_20190131_185628_654.jpg
This sunset actually made me swear out loud when I turned around and saw it after parking in front of my house. Image: An intense orangey pink sunset over a dark neighborhood

Writing days this past week: 4

Unpacking and Another Dinosaur

Unpacking is going well, for the most part. It feels a little frustrating to have to take apart all our work from just a few days ago. We spent all that time and energy packing, but now it must be undone. Still, it’s moving along.

I started sanding down my old desk, because it’s been a mess for years and I’d actually like to be able to work at it instead of on the edge of the couch. Couches are not considered particularly well suited for extended typing sessions. That’s how you mess up your wrists. It’s gonna be an ongoing project, most likely, but it’s satisfying to work on.

I managed to keep track of all my writing stuff during the move, and even organized it more when I packed it up, so that’s kind of a relief. My sketchbook was also tucked in with all my notes and stuff, so here’s another dinosaur.

I drew him right before the move. He’s just a little bitty dinosaur, singing his little bitty dinosaur song. I was inspired by that cool amber-encased dinosaur tail that was found a while ago. They said it was about the size of a sparrow, but it kind of reminded me of a little wren for some reason.

I found a ton of strawberry plants on clearance at my local home depot, so now I have all the berry plants for my new yard.

The pups are settling into the new house really nicely, but they still don’t like being left alone here, so I’ve been dragging them along on a lot of errands. Toci gets bored and tries to clamber onto my lap all the time, even when I’m just kneeling down for a second and she has to settle for perching on one of my knees. She is my super weird little unicorn beast.

Writing days this past week: 0